“Opportunities always look bigger going than coming”

I found out today that my feelings for the apartment I applied for are unrequited. The reasons, I’ll never know. I can only gather the pieces I have left and move on from here. Which is what I will be doing tomorrow and Wednesday as I look at more places. Hopefully  with better bathroom tile. I had a feeling we wouldn’t get this place. 

I first learned of this opportunity in Geneva in February. My boss had asked me if I was really serious about wanting to work abroad, and he said he would “get the ball rolling”. That week I had a phone call with another lady at the firm who told me about the current international opportunities, and the minute she said “Geneva”, I knew that’s where we were going to go. Everything became really clear that this was our chance, and it was going to work out. John said he felt it too when I told him over the phone at work, but he wasn’t quite as excited about it as I was. :) It was very strange, but I walked around the rest of that day letting it all settle in that we were moving here. 

That is not to say that making the decision to come here was easy, because it was the hardest one we’ve had to make. That sounds silly when I write it out because it doesn’t really seem like a problem. It was harder than I thought to make the decision to come here, and it’s harder than I thought to be here. I miss John like crazy, I miss family and friends, I miss the food, I miss the routine, I miss pumpkin chai from Starbucks, and I miss knowing how everything works, among many other things. The first week I was here was the longest week that has ever been. Thankfully last week went by much faster, otherwise I might have felt like I had already been here two years by the time this next weekend rolls around. I’ve teared up at least half of the days I’ve been here, which I know doesn’t help anything, but it’s how I am.

Still, I have a funny feeling it will be harder than I think to come home too.