"Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved." -Erich Fromm

Being far from home is hard when we miss fun things like weddings, babies, and just hanging out on Friday night. But being far from home when bad things happen is even worse.

John’s mom passed away suddenly on Monday, July 1. It was horrible, and I will never forget that day and the feeling in my core that felt like it would never go away. We took the first flight back to Seattle on Tuesday to be with John’s family. I am now back in Geneva, and even though the world keeps spinning, it will never be the same for us. I literally cried out all of my tears, and by the time we got to Seattle, I didn’t have any left. I can just hear Diana saying, “Don’t be stupid; you do not need to cry over me.” I wrote her a letter, and hopefully she can read it from wherever she is. Hopefully she is watching me write this right now and telling me to stop crying.

Dear Diana,

I wish I would have written this while you were still here for me to watch your face as you read it, but I will just do the tears for the both of us.

The sadness comes in waves, and whenever I feel it coming on I try to focus on how fortunate I was to have known you so long and so deeply. You were just the kind of woman you admired: strong, nurturing, opinionated, loving, and so fun. You had the most welcoming spirit of “everyone is family”, and I have always felt like a part of your family. I was always invited to family events, I always got birthday cards and gifts, I knew I could call at any time, and I always knew you would be there. You were adventurous, outspoken, elegant, and beautiful. Beautiful and photogenic – and that is a lucky combination.You were supportive of us - John individually, me individually, and our relationship together. You wanted nothing more than our happiness, and you freely gave motherly unconditional love. To both of us.

What I admire most about you, however, is the kind of mother you were. I know that you know how great of a son you had, but you should also know how great of a husband you raised. I feel lucky to have married your son every single day. He is kind, respectful, enthusiastic, affectionate, loyal, and giving, and I have oftentimes thought of reminding you what a wonderful job you did. 

He is a gentleman. Not a pull out my seat at a restaurant type of gentleman but a gentleman who always puts my needs above his. And I can get my own chair anyway.


He spoils me. Not with material things but with I love yous and hugs and attention. He always makes me feel loved. 

He cleans. Well. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Diana. 

He is energetic. I know this must have been exhausting when he was four with a He-Man sword, but it's so fun to have a partner who wants to experience life. 

He loves with his whole heart. This is something that I know he learned from you.


I owe all of my happiness to you. We will always be the two women who loved John most, and I am happy to share that honor with you. I can only hope that someday he and I will raise children with the care, delight, and pride that you did.

You were a bright and brilliant woman, and we will keep dancing to Elvis and telling your funny stories.

So wherever you are, I hope you are at peace. I promise that I will take care of your boy.

Love, Danielle